Wanted....!!

Do you have the thirst for terrorism, drive towards death and a global vision for violence...If so, then this is the right job for you...
Skills: The candidate should be skilled in bomb blasts, kidnaps, beheadings and/or any other forms of terrorism. Leadership skills are a bonus and would be given higher preference.
Experience: Should have atleast killed a 100 people or injured many. Must have featured in a beheading video at the least.
Emoluments:
Will be better than most of the industry standards with free accommodation in Indian prison. Lifetime supply of food. Free security as well. Peaceful death guaranteed and other benefits like free unwanted media attention plus a chance to feature in the front pages of dailies.
Training and Posting:
Training will be held at secret locations that everyone in P*kistan are aware of and the top performers will be posted in India or the USA/UK.
For further details, Kindly contact P*kistan...:)

Keep the change..!!

There are many at times where we feel a change is required. For some,
this might be at work, in relationships or elsewhere that decides on
the quality and quantity of happiness or something else. What has
baffled me off late is...why the hell would you want to change your
Zodiac sign. Probably its a new year resolution of someone who has an
empty terrace and wanted to garner some attention.
For the uninitiated, there has been a new zodiac sign "Ophiuchus"
added to the current lot which sounds more or less like an alien name
straight out of a sci-fi flick which must be a crossover between
Opium, Octopus and a Japanese Anime chick, not necessarily in the same
order. This has been added as its related to some blah blah and for
various other reasons which I am sure is meant not to be understood. I
cant really fathom the state of the mind of that person who is
actually jobless enough to sit and formulate this whole notion of
adding a new sign. I think that its the same idiot who named a god
forsaken volcano as "Eyjafjallajökull" who has done this also. Its
fine and harmless as long as you keep weird names for things that most
of them don't bother to keep a track of. But to name a new zodiac sign
like this is absolutely stupid and credit will be due to those people
for abusing their right to be stupid.
Let alone naming it, the very concept of adding a new zodiac sign will
send down shivers to many. Along with the birth of this new sign, many
problems and questions are attached to this...Some of them are-
1. Poor Linda Goodman has to add a few pages to her book which
translates to as efforts in the form analyzing people, listing out
their traits, their peculiarities and all that- pretty taxing I must
say.
2. The dilemma still lingers in my mind if I am the type of the old
zodiac sign or my newly changed zodiac sign. In my case, I WAS a
Cancerian but now I should be a Gemini. Cancerians are pretty
creative, intuitive and all that. Now that my sign has changed, should
I stop being creative and stop predicting things.?!
3. Isn't this thing supposed to be applicable only for those who were
born post this addition and not for the ones before it due to the fact
that when I was born on July 3rd 87, the sign read cancer not Gemini.
4. The very loyalties of the people will be questioned and tested as
we never know to which sign should we be loyal to. I for one don't
understand if I should stop my loyalty and pride of 23 years for
cancer and start loving the Gemini.
5. The basic question of whether to be sad to leave the old zodiac
sign which has been part of our lives till now or to be happy for
getting a totally new sign.?!
All these and many more issues will arise thanks to this new zodiac
sign. I feel that if this movement is ignored, I am sure that
everything will revert to normal. If it cant be, Oh well, there is
always the Linda Goodman for all of us to read about our new sign and
for the ones who come under the Octopus or whatever it is, tough luck
people, you have to wait for her next write up.
And for the ones who love this shift in zodiac sign, I would like to
say " Keep the 'change' " (Pun is supposed to be intended) for they
will be needing it along with some pity..!!

To Befriend or not to..

What is Friendship and how wonderful it is to have people who matter around you all the time is something we all have known since childhood and I don''t see any purpose in trying to repeat it here. But what I really want to know is that, are there some prewritten rules or formula which SHOULD be followed to be someones friend failing which you will be out of their lives, you know the things like:
1.Must call up and talk,share things with them for at the least 'n' times/week.
2.Should go out with them even when you have your own reasons for avoiding that trip.
3.Should meet them every now and then.
4.Should actively "participate" in their discussions.
So on and so forth...someone please correct me if I am wrong...but it seems like IF only these things are followed/done, can we be friends..?!.I have had friends who are wonderfully true to me despite the fact that NONE of the above conditions are met. Cant friendship exist without such stupid rules...I don't see any logic in trying to get judgmental over people who haven't followed those afore mentioned rules. As far as my knowledge goes, friendship should be all about the bonding,trust and understanding not some prewritten rules which can be easily broken when distances matter...
Also, I really don't understand how is that someone who was yours can gradually become alien...how can you hate someone you loved...it feels sick to realize the fact that someone to whom you mattered a lot is actually plotting your course map towards the exit...All this hurts even more when you realize that all along their morphing, you have been the same...I don't really understand why should someone else pay for someone elses attitude change when you have always been the same...
Well...I shall stop this note here before others get an idea of me killing myself..NO..I am fine, just wanted to write this for quite a long time...!!